From the Archives

Found an old sim card I had forgotten about the other day that had some little photo gems from Pittsburgh on it. Got me feeling a little nostalgic. Olivia still asks once a week or so if we can "go to Pittsburgh today." It seems such a long time ago, more like a dream than a memory. These pictures were taken in our last couple of weeks there.

Still miss you and all your rivers and bridges and hills and cow paths for streets, quirky old city.

Christmas Eve in Memphis

One of the biggest perks of living near family (while away from most of the family) is that we have built in people to hang out with on holidays. And since both of our families were just getting over the flu, Joey and Katie were the only ones we could hang out with without feeling guilty about sharing germs. Plus, they are super awesome and we would have wanted to hang out with them even if they weren't family and germy like us. Win, win, win. We had a great Christmas Eve:

Bingo for prizes (and lots of dress-ups going on as usual.)

Jane and angels sing.

Aunt Katie playing the part of the good-natured burro, or good-naturedly playing the part of the burro,

and a tender manger scene.

Shepherds gather and Malan narrates Luke 2 with Joey's ipad.

 Mary ponders.

Christmas Eve is so special. I love to see my children beginning to understand what this is all about, and experiencing tender feelings while celebrating the birth of our Savior. Makes me want to try harder every year to keep the commercial side simple, and to magnify the important things.

And I loved sharing our Christmas Eve with the Hales. They bring so much fun and energy and warmth to everything that I feel like I'm lacking sometimes, and our girls soak that right up. It was a lovely evening. Hope yours was too.

Tube Wars

Not much going on. Just trying to catch up on the laundry/cleaning/personal hygiene that fell by the wayside during the flu. (Wow, that is one riveting post introduction. Are you still reading this?)

Also, I'm lacking motivation to exist much in the world wide web right now. Such a lot calling for my attention in the real world that I'm only finding time for blogging if I stay up too late, and that kinda makes me grumpy.  I sure do love the people and happy memories we have here, just needing some rekindled passion for maintaining this little space.  Maybe I'll work on a quick Christmas post soon. Until then, here is an idea for what to do with your leftover wrapping paper tubes:

Emme Turns Two

Well hello again. Sorry for the lapse. All of us got an incredibly nasty flu, except Caleb and Jane who had their shots. I think we were sick for like about six or seven months. I kind of lost track of time and the days of staring at the underside of my blankets all run together now in my memory. Too sick to watch anything or read anything, just rolling back and forth on my pillow with chills and fevers and aches and horrible sinusitis and coughing. So glad I was out of the woods a little bit when it hit my kids so I could take care of them. Olivia was just pitiful and slept for almost two days straight in the thick of it. Emme coughed so hard that she threw up multiple times and I tell you what, as much as I enjoy catching vomit with my bare hands, I will never miss our flu shots again.

Sweet Emme's birthday came in the middle of our bout, so her pictures were taken by me from under a pile of blankets on the couch in a dark room. And I just didn't have the energy to care. So sorry Emms. But I do love your squishy face so very much and you are our favorite 2 year old in the whole world.

(And thanks Malan, you rock star, for making Emme's birthday cupcakes.)

Emme is protective of her stuff.

  We love you, cheeks. Happy Birthday.

A Carol to my King

On Friday at 11:30 I was driving to my daughter's school to read to her class when I heard the terrible news from Connecticut on the radio. I had to take a good while to cry and pray in my car parked in front of the school before I could compose myself and go inside. Like you, my heart is broken for those precious babies and their families.

 I've struggled all weekend to find peace and honestly, it comes and goes. I've held my own babies close, and hugged them until they've begged me off and wriggled away. I knew that before my girls were to head back to school today, I would have to talk to them about what happened so they wouldn't hear it from someone at school and have to face that knowledge alone. and I wanted so much to get to a good place myself so I could speak to them of comfort and peace and God's love and help them really believe it. The last thing I wanted was to take from them their happy, secure, beautiful outlook on this world.

On Sunday I attended sacrament meeting at our church praying for healing, personally and of course for those impacted directly.  It was our Christmas program, and we sang and spoke of Jesus Christ, of his birth and his life. A soloist sang "What Child is This?" and with teary eyes, my thoughts turned to another carol, the Coventry Carol, which tells of the countless children who died at the order of king Herod shortly after the birth of Christ. The joyous birth of the long-awaited Prince of Peace had come to pass, so soon to be followed by horrific tragedy.

Certainly God could prevent such events. Certainly He must weep to see such suffering among his children. He did, after all, send his Son to deliver us, to bring peace and comfort. But deliverance from the physical captivity and pain and trials and losses of this life is not always the kind of deliverance the Savior gives. Often it is the deeper, more profound and endlessly more meaningful gift of peace amid trial, of comfort in sorrow, of a surety that he is perfectly aware of us in the midst of our suffering because he has borne it himself. And the promise that through him, all will be well.

With those thoughts in mind, and with prayerful hearts, Caleb and I told Malan and Jane last night about what had happened. It was hard. Lots of questions were asked and answered. We told them there were loved ones waiting to hug and hold those sweet children on the other side, that for sure Jesus was there to meet them and that they will be safe and happy until they are with their families again. Then we kissed them and told them we loved them and sent them off to sleep. I don't want to have to have a talk like that again, ever. But their tender, innocent hearts understood and rather than fear and confusion, I believe seeds of empathy and compassion were planted.

Like you, I am still processing. I still find myself in tears throughout the day as thoughts of the terrors of Friday come into mind. But this morning I sent my two oldest babies back to school with hugs and smiles. I feel at peace that they will be safe, and that, like one insightful blogger mentioned this morning, angels (likely dear loved ones who have passed on) watch over our sweet children. That I am sure angels were with those children in their last moments, comforting and calming them and taking them quickly on to a much more beautiful place. And I know that through Jesus Christ, all will be well.

Hugs and prayers to all of you at this hard time, from our family.

Airplane

Wow, such a busy time of year, right? So good though. I love this season, I love the excitement, and it's even better watching my girls be excited about it all. But times like these I get to feeling like my poor kids just follow me around from task to task. I find myself thinking "Kay, this month is crazy, but then we'll settle down and get back into a good routine for the kids." And though I know how important it is, it can be so hard for me to stop trying to get the next thing done and just PLAY with them. I really want to do better. I hope I can find a way to minimize all the busy-ness and less important STUFF. I'm taking suggestions, if you've found a way.

Today, for a little bit, we played airplane, and it was pretty great. My legs hurt though.
 I guess maybe I'm out of shape. (Okay, for sure I am.)

This last picture tugs my heart a good deal. Self, this is what it's all about.

We Live Here

The last of our Christmas cards just rolled out of my printer. I love sending Christmas cards, and I love receiving them.

But now I remember why I haven't sent out a Christmas card for the last two years. It's because when I take on a creative project, this happens:

1. box of fabric scraps used for malan's santa suit school project 2. tipped over electric pencil sharpener 3. stack of christmas library books 4. what remains of the box the girls cut apart to make a cardboard island 5. pink heart cookie cutter that didn't get back in the bin after we pulled out the christmas cookie cutters 6. doll broken leg cast 7. funnel, most recently used as a megaphone by emme 8. dancing muki that just got new batteries (yay. i think muki is about to get "lost") 9. alphabet blocks used to entertain emme for a minute 10. malan's "maniac magee" 11. jane's school work from yesterday 12. the vacuum cord-in case someone stops by it will look like i have intentions 13. jane's snack pouch 14. olivia's most recent treasure map 15. christmas cards laid out for envelope stuffing

This is the floor of my office. And don't kid yourself by thinking the rest of my house doesn't look just like this right now. A few children ago I think this state of things would have made me want to absolutely pull my hair out. But today during nap time, instead of cleaning, I made this little sign to go in my entry instead:

Hee hee. It'll last longer than a clean house, and I think I'm going to need it for the next 20 years. I would LOVE my house to be all put together and clean and perfectly decorated. So I try to keep things somewhat organized, and I browse Pinterest for new rugs, and drool over fabrics for our window seat cushion, and save my pennies. And it is coming together. Oh so sloooowwlly. But in the meantime, there are pirate cousins to play with and dress ups to wear and snack times to be had. . .

And our messy, imperfect house works perfectly for those good things.

Outtakes

Here are a few outtakes from our family picture attempt:

Trying to get the kids to smile-

Emme begging for a break-

Binky break and an airplane overhead-

Deciding we're done with group shots after Emme scratches Jane on the face-

Some intense face-gazing. Nice. I think I was trying to be funny and I love that Caleb is like, "Ok. This is what we're doing." He is a good sport.

Katie did such a great job manning the camera, and we got some we really love (which will be forthcoming), but MAN, what a process. The only thing we've found that helps is serious bribery. How about you? Any secrets to taking a good family picture?